Unleashing positivity: Embracing the dog in front of you, not the one you imagined

Navigating life with a nervous rescue dog isn't easy.

Whether you're constantly scanning the environment for potential triggers or changing your plans to prevent overwhelm, you may find yourself adjusting and adapting more than you ever expected. Then add to this the myriad of other possibilities - alarm barking, separation distress, inappropriate toileting, sensitivity to touch, resource guarding behaviour - and life with your rescue dog may look very different to the life you imagined.

Guardians often embark on a journey with their new companion expecting a period of adjustment, followed by park walks, time spent with friends and family and regular outings to dog-friendly places.

But what if this isn't what life with your rescue dog looks like?

What if their world needs to be much smaller to keep them feeling safe and secure?

If this is the situation you unexpectedly find yourself in, you're most definitely not alone. Many caregivers find themselves re-evaluating the life they pictured, as they realise their dog needs something very different.

On a personal level, I've been there with my own dog Gioia, and I know it can take time to make the shift.

Gioia arrived as a five-month-old puppy. She had been found in a rubbish bin at around 6-weeks-old, in the south of Italy. She was the smallest of the litter, she had lost her eye and she was covered in mange. She then contracted parvovirus shortly after her rescue, which resulted in a 10 day isolation at the vet. She was named Joy by the lady who rescued her- perhaps more of a hope for her future than a reflection of her personality at the time.

Gioia's early experiences left her with a totally dysregulated nervous system, and she arrived a noise-sensitive, hand-shy adolescent who was on high alert at all times.

The reality of this in our day to day lives has meant that she becomes very stressed in the presence of new people so much as looking at her. She was (and still can be) reactive on walks. She doesn't like new situations. She barks at any unfamiliar movement, object or sound that she notices in a familiar environment (so much so, she has barked because my stomach rumbled while she's sitting next to me!).

There have been moments during our time together when I've questioned whether we're giving her what she needs to be happy. And there have also been times when I've felt worried by the long journey that lies ahead.

It has become clear that she won't be a dog that enjoys new environments or new people for the foreseeable future - if ever. And while it has taken some adjustment on my part, I also know that Gioia is doing the best she can.

So, in a situation I can't change, I've taken to embracing all the positives that come with our journey.

I've shifted my focus away from the challenges, choosing to look instead towards the parts of her personality that make her who she really is, underneath the instinctive, fearful reactions. I stop to enjoy the moments she lets her guard down, enjoying a nap in her favourite spot or playtime with one of her animal friends.

And it's this shift that has had the biggest impact on my energy around her and ultimately our bond.

As guardians of dogs with behaviour challenges it can be so easy to get caught up in the things we're trying to work on that we actually end up missing the good bits. The moments where you really learn what makes your dog tick, admiring and appreciating the traits that make them who they are.

Perhaps you too could try making a list of all the things that you love about your dog. 

What makes them the special individual they are? 

Take the time to note down positive interactions and desirable behaviours you notice throughout the day. Were there more than you expected? 

Embracing life with a nervous dog is a journey of patience, understanding and mutual growth. And while their anxieties may present challenges, these dogs often possess unique strengths, from  deep sensitivity and connection to quirky personality traits that keep you smiling. 

Focusing on the good bits will not only help support your dog through their fears, you may also find it deepens your bond more than you imagined.